I don't know whether to be mad or just hurt right now. Tonight I was at the bar with my sister. Her friend showed up later on in the night. It's a long story but long story short my sister and this guy made a bet on me. He bet that I would make out with him and she bet that I wouldn't. He has a girlfriend! Do I look stupid? I've been down this road before. I don't care if the guy says he's going to break up with her, he still has a girlfriend. It doesn't matter how much he likes me or whatever, I have morals. He took me outside while he smoked (I don't smoke) and we were talking and he tried to kiss me and I moved my head the other way. Listen I don't care that we're at a bar and how much I've been drinking, you have a girlfriend I won't mess with you. You wanna know what he said to get me to kiss him? That he and my sister made a bet. Yeah, like I would kiss you after that! I got pissed and walked back inside after that. I mean really? Why would you tell a girl that you made a bet about her? I'm not that kind of girl. I could be completely drunk and not make out with you if you have a girl. All I can say is I feel pretty stupid right now. I was still civil toward him and acted like nothing was wrong but it wasn't. I'm mad and hurt. He just proves how guys really are. It's like that quote that says I just want one guy that proves that they're not all the same. Can I have that? Hopefully once I move to Arizona things will just go my way.
I'm moving to Arizona, well that's the plan anyway. With my two older sisters. We're just looking at apartments right now. I'm exited, I really want to do this. I've honestly never really been happy in Chicago. When winter comes along I just want to find the nearest bridge and jump. jk. I'm ready to move on with my life and start over. My step dad is having a hard time with this idea me and my sisters have. Originally it was just supposed to be me and one of my sisters but then my oldest sister heard about it and wanted to come to. So now it's the three of us. I feel kind of bad about having to leave our youngest sister but there is no way in hell I'm going to move in an apartment with her. She's the biggest brat I've ever met and I'm not just saying that because she's my sister. Seriously she thinks she intitled to everything. She's the reason why people look down on our genration. Anyway my parents are freaking out about it and we only made the comment about what we wanted to do. We've only looked at aparents. Nothing's a 100% sure. Expecally now since my sisters has decided that she wants to talk to her ex and see if they are for sure over for good because if they aren't she's not moving. As much as I love my sister she drives me crazy sometimes. They've been over for a long time now. She just can't get over him because she's still living with him. I feel bad because he's seeing someone else now too. It's a horriable situation and I hate that she's going to open herself up just to get her heart ripped out again. I guess she's talking to him tonight. I'm worried about telling my best friend. She's going to freak out and when I say that I mean tears and histarics. She freaked when our other best friend left for college and she was coming back for breaks and whenever she could get away from school. At least she didn't leave the state. So far I can only see myself coming home for Chistimas maybe Thanksgiving but those are close together so I'll have to see where we are money wise. Anyway I'm totally excited and I really just want to move now. lol.
Everything seems to be settling down some at home. No one is really fighting that much anymore. My mom is talking to my grandmother now. The only thing that is still really annoying me is my oldest sister is still talking shit about my mom. I understand that she’s still upset about being kicked out but she did that to herself. I don’t understand why people act immature and don’t take responsibility for their actions.
Anyway on Tuesday I went to the Britney Spears concert, not that anyone really cares but I had a lot of fun.There was so much going on. When we were trying to get out of the parking lot we got into some fights. People who didn’t know how to drive started yelling at us so my sister and my best friend started yelling back at them. It’s not really a concert unless people starting freaking out in the parking lot.
Okay so I haven’t been on in like forever. I haven’t really felt the need to blog about anything until recently. There’s so much drama going on right now. It all started like three weeks ago when my eldest sister came home drunk around 3 in the morning and was causing problems. The next day my mom ended up kicking her out. The whole thing has blown way out of control. My mom and sister aren’t talking and my grandmother somehow got involved because my sister can’t fight her own fights. Honestly this shouldn’t even be a fight my sister is almost 26 years old she should take responsibly for her own actions. It pisses me off the way my grandmother is talking to my mom. She emailed my mom telling her she should love her kids unconditionally. My mom has done and given up so much for us. Yes, there are things that my mom should have done differently but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t love us. My grandmother should take her own advice. She was never a mother to my mom. She used to ignore the fact that my aunt and uncle used to beat the shit out of my mom when she was little. Now she’s trying to act like she was mother of the year when in reality she was just a drunk and now she’s taking my sister down with her. Don’t get me wrong I love my grandmother and my sister but they’re both wrong. Anyway I’m doing my best to stay out of it but I got pissed when my mom told me what my grandmother said. You don’t say those kinds of things to people.
My name’s Madisen but I usually go by Maddie. I’m 21 years young and a middle child. I just got a new job at a clothing/shoe store. I’m very excited. I’ve got two older sister and a younger one, so I’m a middle child. They can drive me absolutely crazy but I love them to death. My friends are super important to me; I’d do anything for them. You mess with them, you mess with me. I talk waaaayyy too much just ask anyone. I’m working on it, believe me. : ) I’m unbelievably clumsy, especially in the morning. Walks seem to just jump out in front of me. I get picked on for it all the time. I have a weakness for chocolate, shoes, clothes, books, cosmo magazine, movies, and boys who can make me laugh. If you have awesome sense of humor than you’ll defiantly get along with me. I don’t believe in labels. Want to know more just ask! : )
